living life yellow.
the ramblings of a 21 year old
It's official. I'm not crazy.
So on Tuesday this week, I received a phone call saying that my surgery would be held that Thursday. It was a miracle. If you have been following my blogs you will know that only last week I had been back in hospital due to extremely painful flareups being told that there was nothing more they could do for me. So you could imagine how ecstatic I was to hear that I would be getting the surgery that could potentially get my life back on track for me.
This was my second laparoscopy so I wasn't that nervous about the procedure but more abut what they would find.
The surgery was being held at Southern Cross hospital which is a private hospital, but they do one day of public surgeries there a week so I was quite lucky. Mum and Leo were with me in the morning to keep me calm. We arrived, bright and early at 7am and I was shown to my room to wait. My nurse Brendon helped me throughout the morning to get me ready for surgery, joking that I was the most compliant patient ever. I told him that my life had pretty much stopped and I was happy to finally be having surgery. Mum had to head off to a meeting at 9:30 and Leo went to have a nap in the car.
Around 10:30 I was taken down to pre-op. Unfortunately the surgery before me was running behind schedule so I was left waiting in pre-op with nothing to do. This is when I had a panic attack. I was given some magazines and chilled out for a bit longer before the anaesthetist and his intern came to get me sorted. They wheeled me into the operating theatre, hooked me up to numerous things and then I was out.
When I woke back up in the recovery room and immediately felt my tummy. I only had 2 incisions which I thought was strange. I didn't feel nauseous at all (This was something I had talked to them beforehand about as it was a big issue in recovery after my last lap) so that was great, but I was in a large amount of pain. Due to the pain being so bad I did not feel groggy or sleepy at all so I was quite aware what was going on around me. The nurse I had was horrible. She was an older lady who was very abrupt and rude. When I was crying from pain and stress, she just told me that "everyone here is stressed." They were also rude to the other patients around me. My surgeon did however stop by to tell me it was a mess in there and that I will have to come back. I ended up lying about my pain level, saying it was a 4 instead of an 8, just so I could go back to my room and be away from the horrible nurses.
Mum met me whilst they were wheeling me back to my room. I told her about the nurses and she helped me write a complaint. The nurses back up on the ward were awesome giving me the painkillers that I needed. I was reunited with my surgery alpaca, which my best friend had gotten me after my last lap. I was sore and tired, but happy to be with my family. The surgeon also came to talk to us, which is when things got interesting.
So it turns out that it really was a mess in there. They found lots of endometriosis which had grown and I had adhesions covering my uterus and left ovary connecting it to my bowel. Also he said my bowel is also abnormally long and I have a retroverted uterus, which made it more complicated. Due to the severity of it they were unable to remove any of it in that surgery which means I would have to come back for another surgery; he said they would try get me in before christmas.
This gave me a weird mix of emotions. For months I had been told by doctors and specialists that I have "hypersensitivity to pain," when really everything has gotten a whole heap worse inside of me! It was a huge relief to know that I wasn't going crazy. My biggest fear was that they would find nothing and that my pain would be there forever.
I got discharged from the hospital that night. I find hospitals very stressful so being there was doing worse for me than being at home at that stage. The whole time I was in hospital my heart rate was around 120bpm (it usually should sit round 80bpm) so it was obvious that I just wanted to go home. Leo drove home at 80kmph to make sure I had no disturbances and avoided every pothole. I wouldn't have got through the day without him and my parents <3
I've been at home for 2 days now and I'm still in a lot of pain. I have a lot of internal bruising and swelling as they did a lot of moving stuff round so they could really see the extent of it all. I've been bed bound. I still need help to get up out of bed and to the bathroom etc.
Sorry if this blog post isn't that well written. I really don't have the motivation to do much at all at the moment and am easily distracted.