living life yellow.
the ramblings of a 21 year old
Hey friends. This is going to be a weird blog post because I don’t really know what I want to write about but I want to write, so grab a cup of tea and let me fill you in on a few things.
First of all, surgery #4 went pretty well. They found more endo (shocker) and my fallopian tube was tangled around my left ovary, which explains all the pain I’ve been having on that left side. My IUD was finally removed, as it was literally wedged into my uterus, so glad they managed to sort that out. Overall, I have been feeling amazing. As expected, my first period after surgery sucked; we are talking a ridiculous amount of blood loss (If you’re new here, sorry, I’m unfiltered,) and a lot of pain. Luckily I was able to hibernate for that week and after it all ended I was back to feeling pretty good. I have been out and about with friends a lot which has been so freeing for me, and overall my mood is so much better. I am starting to feel like myself again, which is so refreshing.
How cute is this doodle by one of my best internet friends Anna! (@an.na.doodles flick her a follow on the gram)
Something I mentioned briefly in the last blogpost also is that Leo and I had broken up. This was a mutual decision and has been a good decision for the both of us. We both have a tonne of stuff going on in our lives that we need to work through as individuals. Things ended on good terms and we are continuing to be friends and look out for one another.
I moved into a flat! Finally decided to move from living with my parents. There were a few reasons for this, but the main one is that my parents live in the middle of nowhere. I now live in a lovely 3 bedroom flat with 3 others closer to town. My room is pretty small but I have a loft bed, which frees up a bit of space. It’s been amazing living within walking distance of all my friends and it has been great to have that extra bit of freedom. That being said, my first night in the flat, my car was broken into! Luckily nothing too valuable was taken but it was a bit of a culture shock as I have been used to leaving the house unlocked and keys in my ignition living in the country!
Also, why are house plants so damn cool. Since moving in I have acquired many house plants. It's a strange addiction but it could be worse I guess! They have turned into little green pets for me. My flatmate, Gabi and I have also started a vege garden which so far, is going good. Bring on springtime when we have (hopefully) an abundance of veges.
Mentally, I'm doing pretty good, or at least I think I am considering the circumstances. Moving into a new place and starting study again is super daunting and full on but I'm loving it. I don't really think I have written to much about it but this year I am starting a youth work degree, which is something I am super passionate about and very excited to start however I have to go away for a week with a bunch of people I don't know, so it's kinda scary at the same time. So far this year I have met some pretty cool people who are making the start of the year pretty interesting. I am so excited for the year to come, but as always a little pessimistic.
This is something I really need to work on about myself because I always assume something horrible is going to happen, which isn't a very good way to live. Especially living with a chronic illness, a lot of the time it can be "mind over matter" (gross, I know...) I also want to work on my self esteem and getting through my insecurities. I am so paranoid that people aren't enjoying being around me or find me not interesting, which again, isn't a good way to live. Throwing it back to my last blog post, where I talked about "just not caring" anymore, that's something I need to actively do more. Constant overthinking is going to be the death of me one day.
We just got wifi so it's pretty exciting here at the flat. I suppose I should try to write a bit more but nothing super interesting has been happening. Let me know if there is anything you would be keen for me to ramble on about.
I freaking love you guys who read this blog and I honestly don't know how I would manage this mess of a life I have going on without the support of my pals, both online and in person.